Dear Cyndy,

Thank you for your letters. You ask about my somewhat
tongue in cheek thesis that unrequited friendship is
more fulfilling. Consider it a distillate of fermented
sour grapes, admittedly ultra-refined: Since to a sensitive
person no friendship is perfect, and all friendship carries
the seeds of disappointment, one protects oneself with a
quasi-Stoic renunciation - Verzicht - Entsagung. The need
for renunciation enters already into Part 1 of Faust, and
becomes progressively more compelling in the works of 
Goethe's old age, - Die Wahlverwandtschaften and the
Marienbader Elegie. The theme takes on an even more
compelling hue in Rilke's First Duino Elegy:

O und die Nacht, die Nacht, wenn der Wind voller Weltraum
uns am Angesicht zehrt -, wem bliebe sie nicht, die ersehnte,
sanft enttäuschende, welche dem einzelnen Herzen
mühsam bevorsteht. Ist sie den Liebenden leichter?
Ach, sie verdecken sich nur mit einander ihr Los.
Weißt du's noch nicht? Wirf aus den Armen die Leere
zu den Räumen hinzu, die wir atmen; vielleicht daß die Vögel
die erweiterte Luft fühlen mit innigerm Flug.

Oh and the night, the night, when the wind with its cosmic space
tears at our face -, to whom would not night remain, longed for,
with gentle disappointment, which confronts the single heart
with great effort. Is night easier for lovers?
Alas, they merely conceal with one another their fate.
Haven't you learned? Cast from your arms the empty embrace
to the space which we breathe; maybe the birds
will perceive the expanded winds with more intimate flight.

=========================

I spent the day recapitulating my memories of Helmut and
reflecting on his rejection of my writing.
Eight pages long and correspondingly windy, - but if you're
interested:

http://home.earthlink.net/~ej1meyer/diary12/d120210.03

Good night.
Jochen