Dear Alex,

Our telephone conversation of yesterday continues to reverberate in my mind.
What I hear is the hypothesis: a) that I am different from ?everyone else,
b) that you do not "understand" me, and c) that you "like" me nonetheless.
The echo tells me: a) that we are all different from one another, b) that 
none of us "understands" the other, c) and unless we are to turn into Trumps, 
each of us is intellectually and morally obligated to "like" the other.
"Dislike" of another person seems to me a symptom of intellectual failure, 
if not spiritual illness.

The differences among us have in part environmental explanations.
As our minds develop they are exposed i) to different languages, ii) to
different public religions, iii) to different social and intellectual
(cultural) environments. Consider how different it is to grow up Amish or 
Moravian or on Wall Street, or in Hollywood, in city slums ... or in GFS. 
Remember the diverse answers Mr. Domincovich received when he asked members 
of his English class to define "the good life." I just found a letter in 
which my father expressed his conviction that "suffering is essential for 
the growth of the soul." That's the atmosphere in which I grew up. Never 
has necessity been declared a virtue with greater elegance. But what will 
the psychiatrist say?

The differences among us have in part genetic explanations. My sister and
I were very different. Reflect on the differences between Jane, Virginia,
Sylvia, Emily and Mary Grace, not to mention the differences between Margaret,
Janet, yourself and Peter.

The differences among ourselves are mitigated and masked by the chameleon
effect. We adapt and assimilate to one another, but the degree to which
one is able to become part of the group is also an indeterminate variable.
If I observe correctly, the chameleon effect is transient and superficial.
It facilitates initial accommodation among individuals, but as time goes on,
and especially under stress, the peculiar needs of each one of us assert 
themselves. Each one of us remains who he or she is. One cannot change oneself, 
although unavoidably, in time one is changed by ones environment and becomes 
assimilated to it.

Love Jochen