Dear Nicola,

Thank you for your letter.  No, you should not plan to come to stay overnight, not on Saturday of this week and not in the foreseeable future.  

The fact that I am disabled by illness may not be apparent to you, because as a matter of conviction, I choose never to complain, and I will not complain now, except to say that I am overwhelmed by the imperatives of daily life.  I am overwhelmed by the maintenance of this very large house. There are two hot water faucets that I have been unable to repair. There has been a leak into the ceiling of the first floor bathroom, the source of which I have not identified. I would have no clean warm bedding for you; I have neglected to purchase comfortable bedding even for myself. Except for space heaters in the rooms which I occupy, the house is unheated, with an ambient temperature between 38 and 42 degrees. I wear several layers of clothes in order to keep warm. I have felt too weak to put the house in order. It has not been cleaned for many years. I cannot invite you or anyone else to spend even a single night here.

Even though I am too deaf to understand much of what you tell me, I have enjoyed your occasional visits.  Telephone conversations where with the use of earphones, I can hear - and understand your voice, are even more satisfactory.  Overnight visits at this time would not work. I am helpless and my only refuge is solitude. As I have told you, I experience life to be ever changing, and it is possible that the time might come when I would need and ask for your help. But not now.

Your father's assessment of me is correct. Rather than resolving any problems
which you might have, your association with me is likely to aggavate them.
I would not hold it against you, or blame you, if you took his advice. My
very best wishes to you and to your parents for the New Year.

EJM