From Nikola Chubrich Subject: re December 28, 2020 Date: December 28, 2020 Dear Dr. Meyer: Last night was the most terrifying night of my life. Thank you for the lesson. It took place, that night, now long ago, thanks be to the living God (whose last prophet said, this Allah, had ninety-nine names), whose second coming was Cao Xueqin, and whose third......?------it took place on an endless ribbon of time, route 2, which I had misdirectedly taken, on a dwindling tank of gas, no wallet, no driver's license, only one hundred dollars to my name, I a virtual refugee-----the lesson you intended, Dr. Meyer, was it not?-----my gold sitting in your kitchen------ BACH The Passacaglia and Fuge in C minor o terror thundering over the radio, healing what was broken, breaking what most be broken BACH WAS THE SECOND COMING OF CHRIST, CAO XUEQIN THE THIRD Are you also the Kaiser, Herr Doktor? Do not dissemble me; I am in too parlous a state to be dissembled. I took Depakote, Thorazine, Propanalol, and Ativan (0.5 mg) a half hour ago. I am running out of Depakote. I need Prednisone imminently. My mother had to come with me to buy a pack of cigarettes. BACH sent me to a gas station in Lexington, thereby to free me from the curse of the homosociopath Robert Cornigans. Homosociopaths are the most dangerous men on the planet, and well deserve the title sodomite (but I spit in disgust: they are not worthy of entitlement. sodomite is an apellation; no, a name; no, an imprecation; no, a curse; no, a foul thing that is the very essence of Hell!). And yet kind Abraham bargained with Allah to save Sodom and Gomorrah! Peradventure ten righteous men be found here. But there were none. And that is because all it takes is a single homosociopath, plus a single homonarcissist, to ruin, not an entire city: but an entire nation. For they go after the children, corrupt them; then the children on turning 18 go after the next generation; and on it goes. How many righteous men are there in the United States? I know of only three: you, Christian Lin......and now me. Because to be righteous, you have to be capable of mere indignation, i.e., without scheming, or calling a lawyer. And I wrote that indignation, and Christian helped. You will read it too. I now make a promise to obey you as my Emperor. Everybody needs an emperor. Hoch der Kaiser. Christian is my King, mein König. Do we not know from the divine Phaedrus (surely Plato is among the ninety-nine names of God that the Prophet disclosed?) that we are two horses, a good one, and a bad one? That without ein König, without a charioteer, we may never dance as the Corybantes do about the rim of heaven. That all of heaven we who have bad horses are permitted is to SHUDDER UNDER THE DIVINE WRATH OF BACH Hoping that, Zeus-like, mit lightning, we shall not be STRUCK DUMB or still worse STRUCK DEAD You do the math! How many hopeless sinners has the St. Matthew Passion and the B Minor Mass killed during its time in existence. The entirely proper victims must be in the thousands by now. A wise Kaiser would and must forbid medical services at any performances of these pieces, for ALL WHO DIE THUSLY GO TO HEAVEN They are met by the Monk and the Taoist NOT DRAGGED OFF IN CHAINS BY YAMA, KING OF THE DEAD Let those who are fated to die in joy, die in joy: FOR YAMA HAUNTS THE HALLS OF ALL HOSPITALS. CAN YOU NOT SEE HIS CHAINS? Even Christ, Bao-yu, though he was not yet Christ COULD NOT SAVE HIS BELOVED QIN ZHONG FROM YAMA Because, Dr. Meyer, as you well know by now QIN ZHONG WAS WELL ON THE WAY TO BECOMING A SODOMITE Whence he would have sodomized GOD And the universe would have collapsed. We cannot kill them. We cannot kill anyone. Yahweh's brimstone has been retired. It is scrapped; it is rusting; it is not even at the bottom of Scapa Flow, where crustaceans nibble at the carcasses of dreadnoughts FOR ON THE NIGHT OF THE CRUCIFIXION, YAHWEH FORSWORE ALL HIS WEAPONS And so he stood powerless as his chosen people CHOKED TO DEATH IN THE GAS CHAMBERS Which I dreamed of after my first, though psyhological, still an assault, by the homonarcissist Chaunten Bemiffle (hereby I commence using pseudonyms. O fiction! O subjuntivo! Animalito de Dios, sigue por tue camino) himself under the Omophorion of the homosociopath R. CORNELIUS BOBBLETOOTH Whose jaws led to a maw in which-----come to think of it, I figured a few things out: BETA DECAY IS EQUIVALENT TO HUMAN ENLIGHTENMENT Ah, may it be, Emperor, that I now am a free Lepton, no longer a quark confined by sociopaths and narcissists! How fine it is out in the electron cloud, for today there came a fourth coming over the radio MOZART And Mozart strikes nobody dead. He only makes one weep in the beauty of the necessary tears of life DEBT OF TEARS And when Mozart came, the Sun GOTT Lattice-like, as in the estuarine vicinities of a delta SHONE Let the sociopath in Lexington keep my money I AM FREE Though that night BACH CONTROLLED TIME And Route 2 turned out to have hidden lengths MY TRIP DOWN ROUTE 2 FROM LEXINGTON TO 95 TOOK 1.5 HOURS APPROXIMATELY and there was extra road, dark road under a dark sky, rising to meet me AND AS I DROVE UP TO TSMOUTHPOROVICH, TSAR THAT I BE OR NOT I nearly missed, shall we say, mein Kaiser DYING BY FALLING ASLEEP AT THE WHEEL For I could find nowhere to pull over, until, a mere fifteen minutes from home, zünkett on Depakote and Thorazine, I could stand it no longer AND PULLED INTO THE LIQUOR STORE PARKING LOT But there I could rest not at all FOR BACH, MERCILESSLY, FLUNG THE B MINOR MASS UPON ME And yet mercifully spared me. And now may I ask you to prescribe Depakote 250 mg and Prednisone, of whatever dose you find suitable for an impending severe ulcerative colitis flare for a man under severe stress, but nearing the end of the road of such stress? Do not call me, for my 'phone is still missing. Was it perhaps only a pseudo-multiversal event across a Lagrangian cusp? If it turns up in the apartment, I can thankfully yes. But I suspect no, for Someone spared me, and therefore heil BACH On Mon, Dec 28, 2020 at 1:37 AM Ernst Meyer wrote: Dear Nikola, I hope your trip to Portsmouth has been comfortable and uneventful. Thank you for the collateral, which I would like to return to you as soon as practical. Best wishes. Please give my regards to your parents. EJM